How Can I Help? - Caregivers

How can we give our friends support and love whilst they give themselves totally while caring for others?   Here are a few ideas:

• Write a letter because "To send a letter is a good way to go somewhere without moving anything but your heart."  -- Phyllis Theroux

• Buy them a subscription to a Caregiver Magazine like 'Today's Caregiver Magazine'. (1-800-829-2734)

• Phone at appropriate times (check any time differences and never call after 9pm their time).

• Drop by with the caregiver's favorite meal or a plate of cookies.  I will never forget a friend bringing me a meal when I was supporting someone else.  It was hard to accept but oh so wonderful.  It was a gift for both of us.  My friend felt useful and involved, and we all ate better that night than we had for weeks! 

• Offer a few hours of care if the situation allows.

• If the patient is unable to be alone perhaps visit and occupy the patient giving the caregiver a few minutes to catch up on paperwork.

• Offer to research into respite care, and community and professional assistance.  Check out resources like the links listed on this site.

• Offer to do specific household chores, run errands or cut the lawn.

• Take the caregiver out for a break.  It doesn't need to be long.   How about a treat like having a pedicure together?   Or let them take a walk alone on a sunny day?

When you do reach out, don't immediately ask how the patient is.  Ask your friend how THEY are doing.  And as with all our hurting friends - just being there, and showing your love will be the greatest support of all.